Welcome back, and if this is your first time here, then even a bigger welcome because you have decided to level up your mental health, the long-awaited moment! Ah, this classic phrase, "What will people say?" has impacted everyone's life in one way or another. If you belong to the Asian community, then it has probably affected you more than everyone else. This phrase has changed so many lives that I am having a hard time putting this blog together. It's so sad to think that some people exited this world before they could be their true selves because of this phrase. Knowing that these people had a chance to enjoy life to the fullest without any fears but lived an oppressed life just because some strangers were going to talk shit about them is a terrifying thought to me. Some people are just lost and need some guidance to achieve that confidence level, but their families' fear gets projected onto them. Before we get into the nitty-gritty of the things, I want to mention that this might be triggering for some people, so use caution. Today, I will dive deep into the meaning and roots of this phrase, its impact, and how you can overcome it. Keep reading it because we are about to go on cloud seven of mental health.
Where The Fuck Did This Phrase Even Come From?
A long time ago, there were three people. Two of them were having a conversation and were talking about their goals in life. The third person was standing there, making weird facial expressions, hearing about their plans. Suddenly, he interrupted this great conversation and said, "Wow, what will people say about these goals?" And boom. This man introduced the phrase, and he left this unfortunate phrase in the form of his legacy before he died. Then people started using his legacy as a way to excuse themselves from uncomfortable conversations and situations in life. Then thousand years later, here we are, still haunted by this phrase and complaining about how we aren't happy.
The thing is, you dropped your happiness in the same spot where you gave value to this phrase. You used it as a scapegoat, which brings you here, trying to understand who sucked your happiness. BRO, it's those leech-ass strangers and even some family members who you don't even care about. Why are you letting them do you dirty? They are not living your life; YOU ARE. The only person controlling your life is you because you are the driver of your Lamborghini (aka life). Also, that story up there is all made up, so don't come after me. Who cares where this phrase came from? All we care about is if we can eliminate it now.
Its Impact
When I used to be like ordinary people on the streets, I cared about people's opinions. This made me have a very negative view of life. I started looking at young, successful people and thought I was too old to start a new gig because they already had this successful idea. I used to get depressed over minor issues. Every time I had to make a decision, I would ask myself, "What if I die?" Other questions that I asked myself included, "What if I fail?", "What if I don't like it?", "Will people respect me?"
My friends, let me tell you something, you are going to get old anyway, so you might as well give a shot to that idea that has been stuck in your head for weeks. The same goes for death. You can't escape death. It's bound to happen, so the best way to eliminate the fear is to go for your dreams. Hell, in the worst-case scenario, you will die climbing a mountain, and you will have a crazy story to tell to dead people, lol. Sorry if I offended you.
So, questions like, "What if I fail?", well you wouldn't know if you fail or succeed if you don't give it a chance but what we do know is that if you don't take a shot at it, you are hundred percent failing. And if you think you won't like pursuing some specific career or a person, well, confirm it by giving it/them a chance. Lastly, "Will people respect me?" is a good question in terms of ethics, but my friends, the only people you need to care about are your close friends and family circle.
Just a couple of days ago, I was having this random conversation with my friend after class. We were talking about how when we go from a broke college student to a good-paying job, all the needy people from our past start creeping upon us and, in some scenarios, start asking us for money. When we don't help them, they form a rumor about us and spread it everywhere. In this case, we must stop caring about what the people will think about us. So, if you become a person like Elon Musk or, in general, a billionaire, think about how many people you will have to stop caring about to get on that level. It's the rule of law; you can't make everyone happy. I promise you that you can be the most ethical person in the world, but someone will have a problem with you.
Z, How Can I Overcome This Phrase
This phrase is potent in a very wrong way. It creates all these mental boundaries for us and makes us think that we are less than a piece of art. Think about it. We as humans are the only species that can use the word creative to describe other people and actually express our creativity. We are all beautiful in our way. Our uniqueness is what brings colors to this world. When we let culture or society hinder our talents for the sake of their comfort, we are hurting ourselves. What’s crazy is that our gut feeling is more honest to us than our brains. I say this from my experience. From a very early age, I felt like I was born to be different than my family. I was born to accomplish something special in life, and that feeling till this day is very active. I don’t know what that accomplishment is, so I’m just going to have to try different things in life till I find that one accomplishment that leaves me satisfied. But the point is, go against the norms, create new rules, normalize them, and spread awareness. Be your cheerleader!
Till next time, peace.
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